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After Black, Things Went Wack
Metallica is Wack! Metallica used to be one of the best rock/metal bands in the world. Now, it is quite the opposite. They could be called the biggest joke on the scene. This tee has been brewed for all of the die-hard Metallica fans that have not been able to show their true feelings about all of the mediocre albums the band has been releasing for years. Wear this proudly and reveal your true feelings. You might be surprised by how many others share the same opinion. Freshly Brewed With: ¼ cup Lars Ulrich ¼ cup James Hetfield ¼ cup Kirk Hammett ¼ cup Rob Trujillo 2 cups ...
$34.09$17.99 -
Hey, It’s Tiger
Tiger is a Serial Sexter. Another Tiger tee? I know, we are shameless. But you would be surprised how many tees this guy can procreate. When we were brewing the first of our Tiger tees, we noticed that the ingredients would multiply and spin-off into another creature altogether. It was almost as if the ingredients were trying to mate with everything around it. Very odd. Freshly Brewed With: 1 Cup Tiger Blood 1 lb Cheetah Skin ¼ Tablespoon Tree Moss ½ Tablespoon Green Grass 130 lbs Rachel ...
$34.09$17.99 -
Where My Ho’s At?
As If It's Still Christmas Time The holidays usually just come and go. You put up Christmas lights, a tree, and pretend to be cheery and festive. Then, a few weeks go by and you have to take it all down and store it back in the attic. With this badass Santa Claus on your chest, Christmas never has to end. Not only can you be calling for your hos year-round, but Santas pimp juice may rub off on you a little bit. If you are lucky, the pimping that you learn from Mr. Cringle could allow you to keep another present year-round. After all, pimping and hos do come with their downsides - the gift that keeps on giving. Freshly Brewed With: 300 lbs Santa Claus 1 cup of Ghetto Fabulous 1 XL ...
$34.09$17.99 -
Paramore Activity
When Tweets Expose Your "Teets" The young, beloved and pure Christian girl that happens to flip her hair around on stage with a microphone for an emo band called Paramore posted a topless picture of herself on Twitter. Talk about attention starved, huh? This "leak" (lactating maybe?) came at a perfect time for Hayley and her band. They embark on a huge tour in the fall. She claims that her Twitter account got hacked, but come on, she obviously wanted the world to see her nips. Delightful, aren't they? Is this whole thing cute or just scary? You make the call. Freshly Brewed With: 2 cups of breast milk 2 lbs of carrot colored hair 1 teaspoon of witches' ...
$34.09$17.99 -
Masturbation is Not a Sex Life
Your Hands Are Not Companions. A lot of people out there apparently think that anything constitutes sex. If a kiss is first base, then why can't masturbation be a home run? All that matters is the end result, right? Well, us here at Iced Tees beg to differ. Consider this freshly brewed tee our plea to all you nerds out there. Get a girlfriend. Even if you have to make her up, it looks a lot better to outsiders when you aren't bragging about how well you masturbate yourself. I mean, cum on now! Freshly Brewed With: 2 soft hands 2 AA batteries 1 hell of a good ...
$34.09$17.99 -
Silence of the Lambert
What Do You Want From Him? Even though I watch American Idol every season and appreciate the talent that Season 8's runner-up, Adam Lambert, possesses, I can't quite wrap my head around his image and the bad decisions he is making for his musical career. First, he came out of the closet. Then, he kissed a guy during a performance on national television. Now, he's just ruining the beautiful musical genre of glam-rock with his over the top "guyliner" and emo hairstyle. Who will silence Lambert first? Freshly Brewed With: 1 Loud Voice 1 Long Tongue 2 Sticks of Guyliner Plenty of ...
$34.09$17.99 -
Tiger Uppercut
Beat That, Ryu and Ken! We all witnessed Tiger Woods sink the big putt at the end of a tournament to win it all. He most likely is wearing his red collared Nike shirt, black pants, and signature black hat. This has recently been dubbed as his power outfit. When he wears this getup, he is essentially invincible. He becomes more than a golf superstar, but rather a supernatural fighting machine. Get too close while he attempts a big putt and you might be regretting the decision for a very long time. Freshly Brewed With: ½ tablespoon tiger blood ½ lb cheetah fur 1 lb Street Fighter 150 lbs ...
$34.09$17.99 -
Jack and Kate Plus Eight
Coming To An Island Near You... As the first Lost spin-off television series, Jack Shepherd plays himself as the father of eight emotionally damaged children. The children's mother, another member of the Oceanic Six, can be remembered as Kate Austen on the show. Together, they put their everyday lives in front of the cameras to show viewers how they are living their lives as normal human beings after the crash many years ago. Their children, one set of twins and one set of sextuplets, are a rambunctious bunch that make living on an island look like a cakewalk. Be sure to tune in to find out which happens first. Will Kate kill one of their kids? Or will Jack be forced to turn to pills ...
$34.09$17.99
